Meditation: Slow but Deep Change

The changes that I experienced from meditation were slow to be perceived but deep rooted. In fact, it's only looking back now that I realize how much I have changed.

The biggest change was a change in my anxiety. I have always had a control problem. I like things to stay in their rightful place, I want to get to places on time, and I want to make the big decisions in my life. When we were blessed with triplets, it seemed that none of that could be achieved. I didn't seem to have time for anything but the immediate pressing needs.

My anxiety started creeping higher and higher and I am sure at it's worst, I was probably not the best person to be around. I did what most people do, turned to medicine and therapy. Luckily for me I also started meditating. Unbeknownst to me there was now something else working on my behalf to reduce the stress, anxiety and sheer panic that would set in as I felt my world getting out of control. I observed the other day that it had been almost a year since I took a sleeping aid, something I could not go to bed without for almost 3 years!
Another great change I have seen is, it takes a lot to get an uncontrolled reaction out of me. I was always a calm person externally, but internally I was reacting, but I figured if no one else saw it, it was ok. Well it wasn't because it was eating me up alive! Now my internal and external reactions match, pretty calm.

The point is all this took time and I did nothing specific in my meditation to address any of these issues. I read the daily exercise from the 8 Minute Meditation book and did it and the rest was working itself out in the background. It wasn't me that noticed the changes first, it was my husband. That's pretty telling right there, you think nothing has changed, but slowly you have, and for the better.